The Homework Issue: Schools, Parenting and Law of Attraction
I have been on and off a school teacher and counselor for about 30 years now. Ken Robinson, also an educator of many years, is a long time advocate for the true education of our children. In this post I will be discussing the homework issue that is part of our schools and home environments, and then Ken Robinson will discuss the big picture of education.
I know of no other issue that stands at the heart of so much conflict in a family. Parents are always concerned about the homework of their child or teenager. It is an issue that stands at the heart of a lot of discomfort for parents. They fret about it, and worry about it, and fight with their children about it. It is as if parents have taken it on as their issue.
Schools have become so frustrated about students not doing their homework that they have set up internet sites specifically for parents to know what homework is to be done that night. Thus, the students now have pressure from both teachers and parents.
Let’s take a look at this issue from a logical perspective.
First of all, schools are places that students are forced to go to. For the most part, students have little or no say about what they learn. They sit in desks most of their day listening to material that often is of no interest to them. They are then given homework so they can sit at home and do work that they are not interested in. This is supposedly their free time.
Many parents act as if homework is their problem, their issue and it becomes a battleground that they fight about day in and day out. At the heart of the homework issue there is a deep sense of not trusting their child to do what is best for them. They are concerned that not-done-homework means an unhappy or unfulfilled future life. They want their child to succeed and think that if they become the homework police, that this will happen.
I do not mean to sit in judgment about this issue, and at the same time to make a decision that will create unhappiness in your family. But you must be aware of the fact that the constant discussion about your children’s homework is a recipe for great distress and unhappiness.
I have been working in schools most of my adult years and I do so because I enjoy working with young people. Knowing about Law of Attraction, I realized it was an environment that goes against the laws of the universe. Forcing people to do anything is like paddling upstream. It is inherently flawed. It cannot succeed, except to provide enormous contradictions on what children want. None of us want to be forced to do something we have not chosen.
In my experience there is a small percentage of young people who thrive in a school environment. I would say about 30%. They have accepted that this is the way it is, and these students have come to believe that this is good for them and it will lead them to what they want in the future.
But most students either have mixed feelings about school or hate it. They have been told day in and day out what they must be interested in.
And then, when their parents get onboard with their harassment about homework, it adds a level of distress that sometimes lasts for 12 years or more.
We must understand that right now this is how it is in our culture, but it is not how it can be. If we do not send our kids to school it is even considered a crime and the punishment can be the removal of our children from our homes. And so, now we have our government becoming an outside pressure for our young people, a pressure that teachers and parents are dancing to the tune of. Yikes, messy, wouldn’t you say?
So what do we do as parents? How do we handle this issue? I think it is good to think about it clearly, rather than become just another pressure in our children’s lives.
First of all, knowing about Law of Attraction is enough for any sensible person to put an end to adding pressure to the lives of the people we love, namely our children.
Let go of this issue as one that you have to solve, it is not yours. I recommend that you do one thing and one thing only with your children: ENCOURAGE THEM TO DO WHAT MAKES THEM HAPPY.
Encourage them to follow their BLISS.
They will not disappoint you, trust me on this. Let them know that you understand they are in an environment that compromises their well-being and that you trust them to manage it their way. Let them know that right now, our schools are inadequate. But given that, you can discover how to make them as palpable as possible.
Homework is not a parents issue, it is your child’s issue and they can handle it. By intervening in this concern, you are basically saying to them: “I do not trust that you can handle this on your own” or “I am afraid for you and so I will put pressure on you too by forcing you to do things you do not want to do” (I understand you are well-meaning, but at some point it is not anymore and you can tell by the tension in the air).
Do not let anything distract you from being happy yourself. Your happiness is necessary for the well-being of your family. When your children see you happy, no matter what they do, they receive a powerful message. That message is “I matter,” “my happiness is so important that I will not let anything interfere with it”. They in turn realize that they too are worthy of happiness, that they too must listen to what makes themselves happy and do more of it.
It is not parents or teachers who are changing the nature of schools, it is our young people. More and more of them are just refusing to cooperate in a system that is so destructive to their well-being. It is insidious, really, because it pretends to care and it pretends that learning things that do not interest us is good for us. Most students are just doing what they have to do to survive this assault on their intelligence. They do not have the words to describe what is happening for them but their actions say it all.
Most students are saying “I will do as little as possible the things that take away my freedom because my freedom is more important than anything. My happiness matters.” I always see this as something to celebrate.
I notice as I am writing this, I feel passionately about this subject - it is because I have witnessed so much despair and destruction of the human soul in schools.
I can remember times with my own two children in their school experience having well-meaning teachers and administrators, calling me and my husband into school to let us know that our kids are not cooperating or whatever. It was always surprising to hear “this is just us caring about your child”, when we always knew this just was not so.
I saw a really great movie recently that highlights a genius child in a school environment. It was such a great show, I recommend you watch it. You will be inspired to trust the genius within your child and to allow them to be who they are. The movie is called “Vitus,” it is a foreign film with sub-titles and well worth watching quite a few times :).
So parents, let go of an issue that is not yours and trust your children. They will not disappoint you when they feel your support, your love, your encouragement to be who they are meant to be.
I would love to hear your comments about this topic, so please share it by commenting below. Us parents have to stick together and share our knowledge, right?
Master Joanie McMahon has been helping thousands of people understand who they really are. A true expert successfully combining her genuine love of helping people achieve their dreams through self-discovery and empowerment. Joanie has enriched and changed the lives of many. For more on Joanie, visit her on http://www.masterschannel.com/users/masterjoaniemcmahon or go to her website at http://joaniemcmahon.com/, Facebook or Twitter.